Skip to main content

A Lost Opportunity

I have been trying to write something, anything worth posting for quite some time now - to no avail evident by my blog hiatus for about 2 months now. But then, having the time and some motivation (insert overwhelming emotions and sentiments) to write something, yay! here it is!

It has been the 3rd day since we (me and pao - one of my blockmates) have become inadvertently "un-blocked". You see, there is a varicella (chicken pox) outbreak around the hospital, where two health workers have become infected with it - and the hospital is trying to quarantine the pediatric ER, wards and the nursery ICU for 14-21 days.

Anyway, our immune systems were not actually so excited to do their jobs that our varicella IgG titers were nowhere around the expected levels for us to be cleared. Thus, in the efforts of the administration and the hospital infection control unit, to control the outbreak, we were not allowed to continue and rotate into the wards with our block (hence the reference of being inadvertenly 'unblocked').

Some may actually be glad to be in our place since pediatric wards can be considered 'toxic' in a sense. The monitoring and the procedures are actually more difficult. However, I just cant help but be sad to the lost opportunity of exposure and learning (sorry, agit intern alert.:p), of actually getting to handle cases of what I read and get to know little angels along the way. I mean yes, we actually get to see a lot of cases (and cutesy kids) in the pediatric OPD (our substitute rotation for the lost ward experience), and that is what we actually need especially as general practitioners especially if we are (I am) not (highly) considering pediatrics as a subspecialty in the future.

But my pediatric ward experience last year was definitely memorable - I mean, yes after it I was actually broken hearted but the experience was definitely one of the best clerkship experiences I had. (See: Pediatrics Clerkship Blog) And it just makes me sad that this year won't be as (I actually can't find the right term). (although, I still have 1 and a half month to go, so maybe we'll see and maybe I am wrong.:p)

Besides, as I try to come into terms with this fate - i.e helping myself get through the stages of DABDA. I've been trying to convince myself of countless possible reasons like (1) baka magkaron ako ng chicken pox, tapos maextend yung pagquarantine sa PGH at kahit na madaming intern at clerk ang masisiyahan dahil benign, kawawa naman ang countless patients who would be deprived of the services of the hospital because of the limited to no admissions, plus the current sick kids at the wards who would be more at risk (2) baka gusto lang ni Lord na maapreciate ko lalo ang blockmates ko kaya ihihiwalay muna niya ako for a while or (3) baka feeling niya masyado na akong nagiging clingy kaya time to rekindle (haha) relationships with other blocks/other batchmates. (and countless more ideas, I am actually amused with myself.)  But then, I always come back to the ultimate reasoning that - everything actually happens for a reason. Who knows, He always surprises me with His ways and I have seen proof of His reasons that are 5 or more years apart :p

I just believe that someday I would actually look back into this and have that 'AHA! kaya pala!' moment. :)

hay. :) I just love how much writing down my sentiments and emotions give me such a clear head and heart :) I need to do this more often, I actually miss it. Time to go and enjoy this schedule, make the most out of it plus open my books (a.k.a kelangan magdouble time sa lost ward opportunity) :p

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Preparation.

How do you put 100 days of preparation, 4 days of examination and 3 days of waiting in one blog entry? You can’t. Haha. So I’m making this a 3 part entry. That very long hiatus from writing and this heart full of emotions had led me craving to write my heart out. So indulge me. I don’t think I would be able to encapsulate all the emotions in that one of a kind journey which led me to where I am today. But I would still try because having that experience is something that I would love to look back to (definitely not do again) but something that I would like to read about when I feel like strolling down my memory lane. It started the day after the review center (Topnotch medical board prep) orientation where we were welcomed with a wake-up call, the board examination is about three months away - 106 days to be exact. Will it be enough? Probably. And then came the diagnostic exams where in there was really the doubt of whether it will be enough.  Parang hindi . But it was...

May cool-off rin pala sa mag-asawa

May cool-off rin pala sa mag-asawa. Akala ko ang cool off ay para lang sa mga malalabong relasyon ng mag boyfriend o mag- girlfriend (para gender sensitive tayo), magkarelasyon na nasa it's complicated status o ang mapagkunwaring, 'mag bestfriend lang kami' pero ang totoo ay nagaaway lagi na parang sila kaya kelangan nila mag -cool off mula sa pagiging mag best friend . Karaniwan natin maririnig sa marami sa mga magulang natin o sa mga tito at tita, ninong at ninang na ang pagpapakasal ay hindi parang kanin (o sabaw ba?) na isusubo bigla at kapag napaso ay iluluwa. Kelangan siyang pag-isipan ng mabuti at gawin lamang kung nasa tamang edad, pag-iisip, tamang panahon at tamang katayuan sa buhay i.e kelangan ay handa ka sa pisikal, emosyonal, mental at pinasyal na aspeto ng pagpapakasal. Madalas kong natatanong sa sarili ko kung ang mga lolo't lola ba natin ay hind nagkulang sa pag-papaalala nito sa mga magulang natin. Minsan naman naiisip ko kung tunay na naiin...

Life Lesson #50: of secrets and lies

I woke up hearing a story, of how everything would end. Of trust issues, and lies and secrets getting piled up to destroy something special, something sacred, something we thought was worth fighting for. Why hurt each other when you vowed to love each other eternally? It says that with love comes pain but when do you say that you've suffered enough? When do you draw the line of loving and letting go? Love. Prayer. Hope. That's all left to do when everything starts falling apart. Continue loving cause in love we may find forgiveness, pray cause in Him we'll never be wrong and hope that there will always be a better future ahead.