Disclaimer: Never thought this would be such a lengthy one:p
I am not yet a parent but in my readings and the series I watched, I have come to the generalization that almost any parent would do anything for their children. I believe that my parents would do anything if not everything for me as well, if the situation calls for it.
This past break i have finished one fictional book and one tv series - the tenth circle and city hunter respectively. I've been dying to write about the city hunter and how it is themed on getting revenge, but i never had the chance to, which for me is quite a blessing, since after reading the tenth circle, i realized that there is something in common between the book and the series - the love of a parent to a child, unexplainable and infinite.
-- Unexplainable in a sense that as a parent you wish to care for your child, to protect them by all means possible and then time comes when it's the other way around - a child caring and protecting his parents. Some may call it responsibility, even duty. But for me it has always been love.
-- infinite, that it crosses boundaries, physical and even moral boundaries; sometimes parents even tend to look past what is real and right in front of them; and sometimes it just really makes you wonder, to what extent this love can go.
City Hunter is a story that started with two friends who fought for their country, yet their country betrayed them, and one of them died. The lone survivor of the attack, raised the child of his friend, implanting in the kid's mind revenge for his real father. And then there was revenge, and issues between the father and the son, but at the end of the day, the father protected his son with his own life.
Tenth Circle is about a girl who was in love, was raped by the person she thought she loved, lied, got involved in a murder, ran away and yet her father was there all through out for her, and even her mother supporting her, protecting her.
When children grow up, parents tend to forget that their children are no longer babies who needs that much care, attention and protection. They forget that their kids who have become teens, even young adults can already make their own choices, and that they should live their lives the way they want it. These teens want to be free - to explore and live, and because parents forget, they treat their children like how they would treat little kids.
I have always formulated the concept that there should be a balance, between the relationship of a parent and a child. It is quite sensitive, that you would need to be careful, a little too much or too little may make the relationship fall over the edge.
Honestly, everything i read in the tenth circle are things that i know exist about the relationship between parents and children, but seeing then written down makes it more real - how parents fool themselves into thinking that their children are the same babies they tended to; how in the real relationship, parents and children say and do what the other party wants to hear and see rather than what they really want to say and do; how each know all of these are pretensions and yet continue to deceive themselves. Life can be beautiful but it is also very harsh.
In my journey of being a daughter and of believing that this is not the right way of dealing with parental relationships, i have tried to be different, to be bold in how i want it to be, in how i see it to be right. But it gets tiring, being different, trying to go against the flow, that i decided to stop and be the good daughter who pleases her parents, so there will be no more arguments. Once or twice, i go back to being the college stubborn me who pushes into doing what i want only to give up in the end.
In an ideal world, once we grow old enough to make decisions, we decide for ourselves, with parents there just to guide. And with these decisions come consequences that we should face on our own -- if we hadnt considered our parents in making those decisions, who are we to ask for their help when we found out we made a mistake? But alas, as i said, the love of a parent can be selfless - that they would go their way to protecting you even if you dont ask, even if you dont want; which also makes you wonder if it is selflessness or selfishness.
Generally, parenting is complicated, like how anything with love always is. that i guess, this is enough reminder for me one day, that when i was young i whined at how my parents are still treating me as a baby; how i hated it when they dictate to me what to do; and yet even with all these i know that they are really trying their best, or simply just being parents.
I would love to write things here that i would say i would not do someday, only to laugh at myself when that day comes and i do everything i said i wouldn't. :p
I am not yet a parent but in my readings and the series I watched, I have come to the generalization that almost any parent would do anything for their children. I believe that my parents would do anything if not everything for me as well, if the situation calls for it.
This past break i have finished one fictional book and one tv series - the tenth circle and city hunter respectively. I've been dying to write about the city hunter and how it is themed on getting revenge, but i never had the chance to, which for me is quite a blessing, since after reading the tenth circle, i realized that there is something in common between the book and the series - the love of a parent to a child, unexplainable and infinite.
-- Unexplainable in a sense that as a parent you wish to care for your child, to protect them by all means possible and then time comes when it's the other way around - a child caring and protecting his parents. Some may call it responsibility, even duty. But for me it has always been love.
-- infinite, that it crosses boundaries, physical and even moral boundaries; sometimes parents even tend to look past what is real and right in front of them; and sometimes it just really makes you wonder, to what extent this love can go.
City Hunter is a story that started with two friends who fought for their country, yet their country betrayed them, and one of them died. The lone survivor of the attack, raised the child of his friend, implanting in the kid's mind revenge for his real father. And then there was revenge, and issues between the father and the son, but at the end of the day, the father protected his son with his own life.
Tenth Circle is about a girl who was in love, was raped by the person she thought she loved, lied, got involved in a murder, ran away and yet her father was there all through out for her, and even her mother supporting her, protecting her.
When children grow up, parents tend to forget that their children are no longer babies who needs that much care, attention and protection. They forget that their kids who have become teens, even young adults can already make their own choices, and that they should live their lives the way they want it. These teens want to be free - to explore and live, and because parents forget, they treat their children like how they would treat little kids.
I have always formulated the concept that there should be a balance, between the relationship of a parent and a child. It is quite sensitive, that you would need to be careful, a little too much or too little may make the relationship fall over the edge.
Honestly, everything i read in the tenth circle are things that i know exist about the relationship between parents and children, but seeing then written down makes it more real - how parents fool themselves into thinking that their children are the same babies they tended to; how in the real relationship, parents and children say and do what the other party wants to hear and see rather than what they really want to say and do; how each know all of these are pretensions and yet continue to deceive themselves. Life can be beautiful but it is also very harsh.
In my journey of being a daughter and of believing that this is not the right way of dealing with parental relationships, i have tried to be different, to be bold in how i want it to be, in how i see it to be right. But it gets tiring, being different, trying to go against the flow, that i decided to stop and be the good daughter who pleases her parents, so there will be no more arguments. Once or twice, i go back to being the college stubborn me who pushes into doing what i want only to give up in the end.
In an ideal world, once we grow old enough to make decisions, we decide for ourselves, with parents there just to guide. And with these decisions come consequences that we should face on our own -- if we hadnt considered our parents in making those decisions, who are we to ask for their help when we found out we made a mistake? But alas, as i said, the love of a parent can be selfless - that they would go their way to protecting you even if you dont ask, even if you dont want; which also makes you wonder if it is selflessness or selfishness.
Generally, parenting is complicated, like how anything with love always is. that i guess, this is enough reminder for me one day, that when i was young i whined at how my parents are still treating me as a baby; how i hated it when they dictate to me what to do; and yet even with all these i know that they are really trying their best, or simply just being parents.
I would love to write things here that i would say i would not do someday, only to laugh at myself when that day comes and i do everything i said i wouldn't. :p
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