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Liaison

Our last rotation before this week/after the Big 4 was Family Medicine, this was a different and quite special rotation because I was the liaison officer for our block in this rotation.

Every rotation/every module has a liaison officer who would act as the bridge between the department where we are rotating and us the students. This was one task that we were all familiar with since first year in medical school, but you'll only get the real deal of being an LO if you have been one.

Luckily, I was only given the chance to be an LO for our block. I can't imagine the kind of stress in trying to please 160 people and in trying to bargain stuff for 160 people.

The whole family medicine rotation was special but i do believe that that entails a separate blog entry perhaps an online copy of my reflection paper.

What I would like to write right now in this very entry is how mentally, physically and emotionally draining it is (it still is present tense) to be a liaison officer. Although it was fun to be oc-oc, it was really just tiring to deal with all the emotions surging in to me throughout the whole rotation.

It has been a frequent observation how I always tend to lose my cool as a leader or even as a team player. In my own defense, I know I get bad trip or really annoyed if (1) people tell me what to do (cause I usually know what I need to do and when to do them best) and (2) if people do not reach my expectations.

I know it's so type A personality to expect from the people around me considering that we are all different and unique beings. BUT what I expect from the people around me are things that I have also done myself. Much like the cliche, if others can, why can't I, only reversed. If I can do it, then why can't they? Besides, I don't do much.

Although then again, I know it's unfair because people have different priorities and different life problems that everything should be placed in context. *deep sigh*

Knowing that I tend to lose my cool a lot of times has also lead me to focus my energies in making sure that I don't blow up. And I guess all this pent up energy, pent up emotions is making me really really tired. that blogging is the only solution I can think of right now to release all these and be able to get my happy and untiring disposition back. (I hope it works).

Another thing I learned about myself, is how I actually individualize my expectations. Something like, having a super depressed RBC cholinesterase even for an acute and mild exposure over a toxin, maybe because this acute exposure is on top of something chronic. sorry for the pharma context, pharma was mentally draining.

Simply put, for people who were first time delinquents, I was actually forgiving but for people who have been chronically delinquent (blame attitude problem and not work ethics), I really tend to walk out although I was actually amazed at how my self control was able to contain all my annoyance and have the courage to just walk out to breathe and get back my easily lost cool.

Anyway, i feel better and i have nothing more to write. Although it was fun to talk and interact with the people from the FamMed Department, I don't think I'd any more want to extend my LO-ship. I just hope that they would all comply and finish everything this week so I can finally move on and enjoy the remaining happy and benign days before Christmas break.

awww, it's Christmas :)

P.S. It really is still heart warming knowing that there are people who actually appreciate what you do. although I am quite not sure if they are saying that just to ease out the rising emotional strike inside me or because they really do appreciate what I do for them. I hope it's the better reason.

anyway, good night!

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